This is my new blog, the start of a new year. I have already been blogging on michousgarden.com for a few years. I started the blog originally as I wanted to create interest for the memoir that I am writing, which will be called I AM – I Exist. Below is the Preface to my book which outlines the theme of the book and the intention for writing it.

I was born illegitimate in 1928, out of wedlock, as the term went then. How has this affected me? Today this would have hardly any impact, there are so many single mothers. I was fortunate in that I was born to a proudly independent mother; she did not have to give me away, hide me away, she was able to live an independent life with me as her daughter. Even when she lost all her money in the great Depression in 1932 and we became penniless, her resourcefulness, energy and courage enabled us to survive. Nonetheless, the stigma of this birth was to rule my life at a deep level for many, many years. How I was finally able to shake off these unconscious beliefs about myself, the sense of shame and unworthiness that I had about myself, are the subject of this book.

I feel that my life is rather like a detective story. Now that I am of advanced years I can look back at the clues that led me, slowly but surely, out of the labyrinth of unconsciousness and unawareness to where I am now, a fully self realised human being. That may sound like a tall order, but I think my story is a fascinating one, and I hope you will too.

But it is much more than a detective story. It is the story of a spiritual journey which I hope will unfold as you read on.

I have often wondered why I have had the life I had, and I have come to the conclusion that it was in order that I could write about it, and so lead others to the place that I have found for myself. I hope this is not presumption on my part, as of course I have not made this journey on my own, but with the help of many people and events along the way. And it is to honour those people that I am also writing this story.

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